Spring "Break" 2010

Many apologies for my bloggy absence.

It's been a busy spring.

• First, I got a second job. More about that in a minute...
  
• Then I've been trying to find homes for several pieces of furniture and a refrigerator that have been taking up valuable real estate in my living room and kitchen. The refrigerator, canIjusttellyou, was only just removed this past Friday. Yes, that is correct. This. Past. Friday. It's been sitting in the middle of the kitchen since this happened. Trust me, nothing makes a tiny kitchen feel even tinier with a second refrigerator IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FLOOR.
  
• Then there was Lent and Palm Sunday and Holy Week and Easter and all the pomp and circumstance and time suckage (sorry, Jesus) that comes with it.
  
• There was also the great health care debate, the rise of the Tea Party, and Sarah Palin coming back like a bad rash - so you know I've been pretty busy cleaning up every time that pesky head of mine explodes.
  
• Sometime in there March Madness began, of course, and has consumed a vast amount of time. But what an amazingly great tournament it has been! I'm watching the final game as I write this and keeping the faith that Butler will pull through. My Ohio University Bobcats whipped Georgetown, but then had to play Tennessee. My Tennessee boys beat OU and then made it past the Sweet Sixteen for the first time - in school history - thanks to a nail-biter against Ohio State. They did lose a heart-breaker to Michigan State BUT the good news is I finished third in our basketball pool.
  
• In the middle of all this was my birthday. Woo hoo! Or boo hoo. Depending on your perspective. The final year of my thirties has begun. Then again, much of my thirties has not been kind to my mental health, so maybe I should be happy to turn a new corner.

And speaking of turning a new corner...

• That part time job I mentioned at the beginning of this post? It's now my new full time job! You're looking at a communications coordinator WITH health insurance. Medical, dental AND vision.
  
  That's right, I'm fancy.
  
  I would have taken this job just for the fact that I no longer also have to be the office manager / tech support / lackey / fixer of spreadsheets for crazy bitches for no additional money. The rest - like a 403(b), life insurance, tuition reimbursement, and more money for only doing one job - is merely gravy.
  
  I still work for a non-profit, but now it's one in education, not the environment. That part was a bit difficult, but I know it will be the right move in the long run. It also means you're going to have to endure a lot of tirades and ramblings about climate change, water conservation and polar bears and shit since I won't be using up brain cells on these things at work any more. (Not that I worked with or thought about polar bears much at my former job, but you know what I mean...)

So I hope your spring has been exciting as well. It's been 80+ degrees for the last four days and I completed the first yard mowing of the year today. I guess that means summer is on its way whether I like it or not.

Don't know about you, but I think I'm ready for a vacation.

Observations in Madness (Sunday night)

I actually spent a great deal of time this weekend doing things other than watching basketball. I went shopping. I went to the grocery store. I went to an art gallery and then to a sushi bar - where I did occasionally stretch my short self as tall as I could muster to peek up over the top of the booth at the TV in the back of the restaurant - but still, I participated in witty conversations and only managed to get soy sauce on my new shirt once. I went to church and to grown-up Sunday school and to lunch and then did yard work. All the while assuming that I was still clinging to life in 6th place in our pool.

And then I updated our brackets just a couple of hours ago, and dude, I am somehow now in 3rd place. I managed to pick 15 of the Sweet 16. Trust me, I am as stunned as you are. I don't really expect it to last, but it is nice for now. Here's what else:


1. I am a bit self-defeating. The on-going battle I have with myself every March when I fill out my bracket is always head vs. heart. Who do I want to win and who do I think will win. It's often not the same thing. If my bracket involves a couple of innocent dollars, I usually go with my head but then find myself on a Sunday evening yelling for Siena to beat Louisville even though I have Louisville in the Final Four.

So yeah - how 'bout that Siena / Louisville game? What was a heart-breaker! Or. Go Cards! I'm good either way...


2. In other crazy games... Western Kentucky - so close! And Marquette - I'm sorry your game ended so strangely and unfortunately (well kinda - because again - Go Mizzou!) but your coach sorta scares me and he maybe should invest in some Nylabones or something because that one kid chewed on his towel for the last like 15 minutes of your game.


3. Say it ain't so! The Lady Vols will NOT be headed to the Sweet 16 for the first time ever. Ever. I guess it had to happen sometime. Also, the Middle Tennessee State University women's team lost a very close one. The coach of the Lady Blue Raiders is the neighbor of a friend of mine and I am really bummed for him. I probably shouldn't keep up with the women's tournament if my only reason for doing so is to hope that someone beats UConn, but hey, at least I'm honest.

Happy Sweet 16!

Observations in Madness (Friday - very late)

1. Bless their hearts. Fitting comment for East Tennessee State University both because of where they're from and for how they played. We all know a #16 has never beaten a #1 - but it has to happen sooner or later, right? For a brief moment it looked like it might be possible when ETSU played Pittsburgh this afternoon. They played confidently for every minute of the game, never getting rattled or losing steam until the very, very end when Pittsburgh finally pulled ahead by double digits. Two hard-fought losses by the Volunteer State today. Memphis? I hope you were watching and paying attention.

2. What's up, ACC? Clemson, Wake Forest and Florida State are out? Two of you to Big 10 teams? What - do you think it's football season? You're killing me. Well, just my bracket actually, but still...

3. Upset, upset. My mother was the only one who picked Dayton over West Virginia. A couple of us correctly picked Siena over Ohio State (how awesome was that game?!) and a few more picked Arizona, Boston College or Wisconsin. But only one of us picked all four. And it definitely wasn't me. I commented at dinner earlier on the lack of trash talking in our pool, but I have a feeling that's all about to end.

How's your bracket?

Observations in Madness (Friday Two-ish)

1. Oh the wailing and gnashing of teeth. Tennessee lost by two points in the last few seconds of their game today. Fortunately for my bracket I did not pick them to go past the next round, so at least there's that. But still... sadness and woe...

2. Last night saw local favorite Western Kentucky upset Illinois. My mother always takes the opportunity during basketball season to mention how she nearly went into early labor with me in March of 1971 because of Western. They were the "giant killers" that year and every game they somehow kept pulling out win after win. So, your call - my love of March Madness - nature or nurture? I don't have the Hilltoppers picked to go past the next round but, you know, I am having a birthday party on the same day as the Final Four - so how cool would it be if Western made it that far? Yeah, I know...

3. Speaking of my mother - she's leading our basketball pool. There are eight of us in the pool and the only game she didn't pick from yesterday was the Clemson/Michigan game. And that's not her fault in the least (or five other people in the pool) is it, Clemson?!?!? No, no it's not.

As for me, I'm hanging in at 5th place.

Observations in Madness (Thursday Noon)

Good Gravy it's been a long and busy week. Soooo behind on my photo project it's not even funny. St. Patrick's Day was fun. Work has not been. But it's Thursday and it's the first round of basketball, so things are looking up! Most exciting is that I finally got some willing participants for a basketball pool this year (last year was a bit of a challenge). Are you in a pool? Paying attention? Couldn't care less? Here's what I've seen so far:

1. God Bless the Internet. Have I said that lately? I am glad CBS finally got with the program and figured out how to stream all of their games over the internet. If they hadn't, I would be saying God Bless our government for pushing back the switch to digital so that I could drag my little TV set in and watch the first two days of the tournament in my office...

2. Seriously, Cal State Northridge?!? Worst jersey font EVER.

3. I picked Memphis to go all the way. Did I pick them because I am such a die-hard Tennessean? No. Most of west Tennessee annoys me. I picked them, in part, because I do think they're a good team and are ripe to maybe, finally win it all. And in part because I'm tired of their coach talking about how overlooked, underestimed, underappreciated and disrespected his team is and it would be nice for him to have to find something else to whine about for a while. But right now?!? Right now 2 Memphis is having a fairly hard time against 15 Cal State Northridge. If they don't get their act together my entire bracket could be seriously compromised before the first three games of the tournament are over. Note to Memphis: if that happens, I will lead the pack in petitioning to have your third of the state given to Arkansas.

Number One. Thousand.

This week there's a pretty good chance that Pat Summitt will win her 1,000th game, bringing her record to 1,000 wins and only 186 (or 7 or 8) losses. The first opportunity is tonight at Oklahoma and the next is Thursday in Knoxville against Georgia.

Just like with her 800th and 900th wins, the critics, cynics, chauvinists, and general whiners, will start to kvetch and say that her 1,000 wins aren't the same as if a men's coach did it because there isn't the same level of parity in women's basketball that there is in men's basketball. True. And that she was only able to achieve this number of wins because she started coaching at 22 and men's coaching is too competitive for any of them to be able to start coaching at such a young age. Also maybe true.

I don't deny that these are things to consider. I just think maybe they should also consider that there is another side to this coin. That maybe there are other obstacles and other factors that some of the greatest in men's basketball coaching never had to deal with and/or probably aren't willing to do.

Because you know what else is true?

Pat Summit's starting salary was $8,900 a year. For that pay, in addition to coaching the team, her job included making flyers and posting them around campus to get people to attend the games, doing the team's laundry, and driving the van.

She went into labor while in another state recruiting a player (Pennsylvania, I believe). She got back on the plane and flew home so that her son, Tyler, would be born in Tennessee. Two weeks later she and Tyler were back on the plane on another recruiting trip.

Last year, to support the men's team in their game against Florida, she dressed up as a cheerleader and performed at halftime.

She even carpools to work.

There are a lot of other facts and figures that could be tossed about regarding game attendance, season ticket sales or championships won. Or that 65 of the current coaches in women's college and professional basketball are former Lady Vol coaches and players. Or that until this past year the highest-rated sporting event on ESPN was UT vs. UCONN for the 2004 national championship. But I'm sure they could all be countered with some wise-ass opinion inevitably arguing the superiority of men's coaches.

Fine.

But until I see Coach K or Bobby Knight in a cheerleading outfit - they can keep their opinions to themselves.

Good luck Coach Summitt.

Go Lady Vols!

You might want to check for winged pigs...

Alabama plays Florida today for a shot at the National Championship?

Gert Says:

ROLL TIDE!!!!

Observations from the Basement #1

I have great honor and respect for the game of baseball, but I shamefully admit to only half-assedly pay attention to it until it gets much closer to the World Series. Of the teams I do like (Braves. Reds. Cubs.), I'm certainly not a rabid fan and don't have any stakes in or ties to any rivalries or curses. To sum up, I am no expert on baseball.

But this I know:

You don't tear down Babe Ruth's and Lou Gehrig's stadium.

And I'm not exactly sure why this bothers me so much. Maybe it's because in this time where our country's greed and laziness and shortsightedness has gotten us into yet another big pile o' trouble, this just seems like a giant, ugly metaphor for it all.

I am glad I had the chance to go to a game in Yankee Stadium though. Don't have a clue who they played. We were so far up in the stands that I couldn't really even tell who was who. But it was fun. I enjoy seeing the enthusiasm and dedication of fans regardless (in most cases) of what team it is, and the Yankees are no exception.

It was a warm, early summer's night, a total blow-out, and to keep us entertained I think every Yankee broke some sort of random record - like Most Number of Base Hits in a Home Game in a Month not Ending in the Letter R - and that sort of thing.

There were also a great number of hot dogs and beers enjoyed in our section and my friend's boyfriend, being drunk, from New Jersey, and a bit of a tool, started loudly joking with me about being from Tennessee / the South. Others around us, being bored with the game, and what with not being able to actually see the game and all, started to good-naturedly chime in. They all took a liking to me and we spent most of the rest of the game with them telling me stories about coming to games and living in New York and we each practiced saying different words and phrases with each other's accents. I loved every minute of it.

Eventually they decided that with all of the random records being broken that night we each deserved a record of our very own. And they started with me. So you will be proud to know that I am The Tennessean to Consume the Most Number of Beers in Section 31 / Row ZZ / Seat 9 of Yankee Stadium. Ever. Take that Derek Jeter. I may be a bit fuzzy on the actual location of my seat and would need to dig out my ticket stub from a box in a closet somewhere if someone needs official verification. But that's pretty close and it's still a title I wear proudly.

So I am sad for those guys today. I know that if Neyland Stadium were ever torn down I would be devastated. And even though I would never consider myself a Yankees fan - and, truth be told, if I lived in New York City I would probably be a Mets fan - I will always have a tiny spot in my heart for the Yankees.

A tiny spot in my heart for Yankees???

That's quite something coming from this Southern girl.

Olympic Observations

I have been good and taking my pictures and thinking of summer-related essay topics, but the first week of August all I did was work and last week all I did was work and watch the Olympics so I'm two installments behind. But I can't help it. Work stuff aside, I'm an Olympics geek. Normally I have a slight preference to the winter games, but during the last summer Olympics I was painting my kitchen cabinets. It was just me and Bob Costas for howevermany weeks painting and sanding and learning the minutiae about every athlete. So this year I feel like I'm being reunited with a lot of old friends. I'll get back to my summer assignment shortly, but to get the typing fingers limbered up again...

1. I am not tired - nor will I tire any time soon - of Michael Phelps coverage. Run him into the ground all you want to NBC, I can take it. Dooce named him to her top five list of male celebrities - twice - and I would have to agree with her. I did do the math first though and while it isn't entirely impossible, I am not realistically old enough to be his mother. So I feel okay in going on and on about him. What is it exactly? Is it that he is both terribly hot and adorably dorky all at the same time? Or that he is hottest WITH the swim cap on. What other human even looks good - let alone BETTER - with a swim cap on? He needs another gold just for that. Or that when asked if he was going to get to enjoy the rest of his time at the Olympics, he said he was, but that he did want to get home soon because he missed his dog. That would have made ten gold medals if I were judging.

2. Speaking of swimming... it's been well-established that I am not a flag-draped, "U-S-A" chanting patriot. I get just as excited for other countries when they do well in the Olympics. But when our men's relay team came from behind and beat those snarky, trash-talking, little Frenchie bastards it was almost like I was nine years old again watching the US beat the Soviets in hockey. Not quite - but still pretty damn good. It was made all the better when they showed such good sportsmanship and class and walked directly over to the French team after the race and shook their hands. Makes me want to wear one of those Uncle Sam hats. Okay, not really...

3. One of the many things that keep me from being a flag-draped, "U-S-A" chanting patriot is someone like the women's pole vaulting coach. If I could hand Michael Phelps gold medals for Wearing a Swim Cap Hotly and Total Adorableness for Missing His Dog, then I would so award this dude golds for Extreme Jack-Assedry and Being a Serious Tool. An American pole-vaulter-woman comes in second, losing only to what is apparently the Greatest Female Pole-Vaulter in the Known Universe Ever. After winning silver, she goes over to her coach in the stands - and he berates her! And he's mic'ed so the entire NBC viewing audience gets to listen as he says things like "When you can't even do [pole-vaulty lingo] what do you think is going to happen!?! All you get is silver! That's what happens!" Maybe it's just me, but I don't think I'd be such an arrogant and condescending pig toward a woman who carries around a giant pole for a living...

4. There are a lot of adjectives to describe gymnastics. Funny and refreshing usually don't make the list though. It's always so serious. Everything is so dire and intense. But with the scrappy US men's team's jubilation in working toward an unexpected bronze medal and Bela Karolyi getting all riled up about underage Chinese and bad judging, gymnastics has been a breath of fresh air. I love it when people on camera stop with all the pretense. So many other times we have to endure people who are disappointed WITH A SILVER MEDAL or are so prepped and rehearsed about what to say on camera that it gets to be tiresome. But when the guy on the men's team turned to the camera and genuinely and excitedly shouted "Bronze medal, baby! That's how we roll!" or when Karolyi in one of his tirades kept shouting "ez repoof!" (is ripoff) about the judging of the women's vault - I was cracking up.

5. There have been several "celebrity" deaths this spring and summer that have really affected me. They each seemed to be a genuinely good person who went about doing what they loved with passion but without a lot of fanfare. Most famously in the news have been Tim Russert and Bernie Mac. And even though I didn't know them, I really do miss them. But while watching the Olympics I have also been missing Jim McKay. For my whole childhood he was the voice of the Olympics (not to mention the Kentucky Derby). I can hear his voice and see his golden blazer perfectly in mind. NBC has covered the Olympics for a while now and in general I think they kind of suck at it (even though I do admit to having a geeky crush on Bob Costas). No one did the Olympics like ABC and that was mostly because of Jim McKay. He would have really gotten a kick out of Michael Phelps, the men's gymnastics team, and Bela Karolyi. Plus I'm pretty sure he would have had a few choice - but tactful - words for the French relay team and that pole-vaulting coach.

Basketball? Huh? What? Final Who? Bueller?

I know not what you speak of... this NCA... A is it?

Yeah. So.... About those brackets...

I had two. One from my head: fairly rational with a few bold and risky choices, written in black Sharpie and entered into a friend's office pool. And one bracket from my heart: scribbled in pencil with many eraser marks, buried somewhere in a stack of magazines in the living room. An extremely delusional little bracket, but warm and fuzzy and had it come true, would have brought about peace and harmony to all planetary systems.

The one from my head had Tennessee and UCLA playing in the final game and Tennessee losing by two points. Of course I was counting on the fact that my Vols would be out of their shooting slump and actually make it past the Sweet Sixteen...

Yeah. So... Let's move on...

The bracket from my heart had Tennessee winning (hello? were you really pondering that one at all?) and an appearance in the Final Four by a Davidson, Austin Peay, Belmont or Western Kentucky.

But no. All four number one seeds are now in the Final Four. Yawn.

And my two brackets? Headed to the great recycling bin in the sky. Sure, I guess UCLA could still win it all and "technically" I would have picked them, but where's the fun in that?

At least we still have the women's tournament. It's on cable though, so until we get a little further along I'm happy with listening to the Lady Vols on the radio.

Sunday night I listened to the end of the TNLV / Notre Dame game on the radio. While doing that I had the TV on PBS (waiting for the replay of Sense and Sensibility, of course). BBC news was on and for a brief moment I had it on mute with the closed captioning. And I tried to read British newscaster commentary while listening to Southern basketball commentary. And then a tiny aneurysm began to form in my head...

I should have just turned off the TV, but not wanting to completely back down from a challenge, I only turned off the CC. Then a story came on about cricket teams (or is it clubs?) in the India Premiere League and I quickly realized that there was not a need for any captioning, closed or otherwise.

There were clips of India Premiere League teams (IPL for those of you not in the know...) on the field doing things and then clips of fans watching cricket games in bars and restaurants, cheering on their teams. And then clips of people in business clothes with laptops, grouped around tables in a hotel ballroom. Someone at a podium would announce something and a table of people would cheer. One table represented the team from Mumbai. Another table was from the Mohali team - the "Punjab Kings," as they are known. I think. Maybe. The team is owned by a Bollywood actress. Preity something. And in the clips from her interview she seemed a little irked.

I'm not quite sure, but I would be willing to bet that Mumbai got a higher seed in their tournament than Mohali - even though their strength of schedule, conference record and league standing are waaay better. And now instead of getting matched up with some easy team like Delhi, they're going to have to face that bad-ass team from Bangalore and she is SO NOT happy about it.

I feel your pain Preity. I feel your pain.

The universal language is supposed to be math. But I think its sports. The only thing I know about cricket is that I think they wear white and take breaks to drink tea. I probably know even less about India. And I may not have interpreted that news story correctly, but I could relate to every scene. The passion. The enthusiasm. The desire to compulsively shout obscenities at a television screen.

And now I'm kind of wondering if there's a bracket and an office pool somewhere for the IPL...

If so, I'm picking Mohali to go all the way.

Go Punjab Kings! Go Lady Vols!

Round One. Day Two. Divine Intervention?

Holy Week and the first two rounds of the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament are the exact same four days.

What were they thinking?

You'd think the church would know better.

But seriously... who got to see that Duke / Belmont game last night?

I did not get to see it as I was at... church. Good girl that I am. Good girl who after communion sneaked downstairs to the church secretary's computer and checked the scores online. Good girl who then sneaked back upstairs and quietly whispered to a few of her fellow basketball fans that our very own 15-seed Belmont was up by one point over 2-seed Duke with one minute left. Good girl who patiently waited until the service was over, altar was stripped and cleaned, recessional concluded, dismissal was made and everyone exited the sanctuary in respectful solemnity to hop back downstairs only to find out that the Bruins ended up losing by only a point. So close!!! (Shakes fists at sky).

On a side note, you may have known / figured out that Belmont is a school here in Nashville. It's a great, small private college that recently shook its religious affiliation to much wailing and gnashing of teeth (on the part of said religion, not the school). And I'm sure this morning there are some higher-ups within said religion wagging their finger and saying that had they stayed within the flock they would have had a better chance at beating the Devils.

And finally... the Lord's name has unfortunately been taken in vain several times as American University gave Tennessee quite a hard time in their game today. Tennessee did finally figure out how to win. Amen.

So now I guess I need to be sure to make it to Good Friday services.

I just need to find a good time to sneak out and check the scores of the Vanderbilt and Mississippi State games....

Happy Easter! Go Vols!

Round One. Day One. Who's in Your Bracket?

Like there aren't enough March Madness blog posts being sent out into the universe today...

But how many involve two heathen dogs?

My attempts at an office pool haven't gone over all that well (C? M? Are you paying attention? I'm talking about you.) So instead I've resorted to my housemates. It's a struggle finding ways to keep them entertained in the evenings anyway, so last night we played a little game of "Pick Which Teams You Think Will Win" aka "Pick Which Hand the Doggie Crack String Cheese is in."

And so I bring you:

Gert's NCAA Basketball Mostly Canine Tournament Pool!


Elsie:
Elsie's strategy was to be fast, decisive and straight to the point in selecting her teams / pieces of string cheese. In (what could be) her words: "I like UCLA's speed and UNC's quick-thinking but you have to like a team whose mascot is the devil so I'm going with Duke NOW SERIOUSLY I'VE GOT THINGS TO DO SO JUST GIMME ALL THE CHEESE AND NO ONE GETS HURT."



Oliver:
His plan of action was to ponder the options carefully and try to minimize distractions. His thoughts on this year's tournament: "I like birds so I think I'll pick Kansas. HEY IS THAT SOMETHING SPARKLY UNDER THE CHAIR!?! I would like to pick Memphis, but I'm afraid of cats. Maybe Stanford. They have a tree. Trees are nice. HEY ELSIE ATE MY STRING CHEESE!" (When all was said and done, Oliver actually picked Belmont. And then went to take a nap.)


Gertrude:
Her method involved studying the predictions of professionals from ESPN.com and CBS Sportsline.com and analysing team records. But, despite a sudden craving for a cheese sandwich, she ultimately just went with her gut instincts. "Georgia's really on a hot streak right now and I think Western Kentucky could surprise some people.... and oh yeah... TENNESSEE'S GOING TO WIN IT ALL! GO VOLS! GO VOLS! GO VOLS! "

It will be interesting to see what happens.

Loser buys more string cheese.