Old Joke

I know I'm getting older. It's not a secret. I still look fairly young for my age and for that I am thankful. And apparently that's all I should be thankful for since I've recently learned I'm old enough that no longer will anyone contradict me when I joke about my age.


Conversation One - Las Vegas Casino

Friend (who was constantly on the lookout for / trying to pimp me out to cute boys he spotted): "Look! Sailors! That little blond one is cute - you should go talk to him."

Me: "He is cute, but I think I'm old enough to be his mother."

--- Crickets ---

Me (pretending to be Friend): "Oh no, Gert - NO WAY! You're not that old!"

Friend: "Oh. Sorry. Was I supposed to have said something?"



Conversation Two - My Mother and Stepfather's House

Mother (while we were watching an interview show with various new UT football coaches - most of whom are ridiculously young): "That's the Quarterback Coach!? What is he - 12?!"

Stepfather: "I think so. And what's Lane Kiffin [new head coach] - 34?"

Me: "Yeah. I think I'm older than everyone on the coaching staff except Monte Kiffin!" [Lane Kiffin's dad, who's like 70]

--- Crickets ---

Me (pretending to be parents): "Oh no, Gert - NO WAY! You're not that old!"

Stepfather: "Oh. Sorry. Was I supposed to have said something?"